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In this episode, I am joined by Sarah Stannard, a UK-based health and wellness coach who shares how her MS diagnosis led to a complete lifestyle transformation and ultimately a new career.
Sarah reveals how physical wellbeing directly impacts intimate relationships, drawing from both personal experience and client success stories. She explains how improvements in nutrition, sleep, stress management, and exercise enhance confidence and connection.
The conversation addresses common challenges like burnout and chronic illness, offering practical strategies for busy professionals. Sarah emphasizes that even small changes in self-care can significantly improve relationship quality and physical intimacy.
By prioritizing wellness, Sarah shows how individuals can discover renewed vitality and capacity for connection that enriches both health and love.
If you love this episode, Rate and Review us on iTunes
Meet our guest:
Sarah Stannard
Sarah is a certified Corporate Health Coach dedicated to empowering individuals and organisations to prioritise their health and well-being.
With a diverse background spanning two decades as Director of Sales and Marketing, her journey towards health and wellness began when she was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease in her mid-thirties.
Click here to view her website for her coarching practice.
And you can connect with Sarah here:
Meet your host:
Andrea Balboni
Andrea is a certified Sex, Love and Relationships Coach at Lush Coaching.
Her mission is to help people experience as much pleasure and fulfilment in their personal intimate lives as they desire.
From finding love naturally and easily, to deepening connection and resolving conflict, to keeping passion alive over the long-term, I support individuals and couples in all phases of intimate relationships.
Work with me - Book a 30 minute consultation call and learn how coaching with me can help.
Or send me a message here and let’s begin the conversation.
Let’s continue the conversation
Healthy Habits, Hotter Nights: How Wellness Shifts Supercharge Your Love Life with Sarah Stannard
Andrea: [00:00:00] Hello and welcome to Lush Love, the podcast. I'm your host, Andrea Balboni. Through conversations with special guests, we'll navigate the intensity of intimacy, the highs and lows of relationships, and the beauty and complexity of the erotic, desire and pleasure.
I'll guide you through embodiment practices and meditations in special episodes that will bring to life and make real what you learn from conversations with thought leaders, teachers, and guide of all kinds. My goal is to support you, to experience intimate relationships in the way that you desire, so that you feel nourished by deep, meaningful connection, by passion and pleasure.
I'm so [00:01:00] glad you're here with me on this journey. And if you are to rate and review this episode, if you feel the same.
I am here today with Sarah Stannard. Sarah is a health and wellness coach in the UK. And when I spoke to Sarah about coming onto this podcast, she jumped at the chance because Sarah has a very clear message to share about how giving time and attention to everything from nutrition and exercise and mindset directly impacts your quality, the quality of your intimate life and also personal relationships.
So we're going to dive deep exactly into what it looks like, how you can optimize your lifestyle for enhanced pleasure and deeper love. Welcome Sarah. It is so good to have you here.
Sarah: Thank you so much. Yeah, I'm excited to be here and chat to you today. Thank you for the invite.
Andrea: My pleasure. [00:02:00] So your journey into health and wellness began with your own diagnosis, I know, of an autoimmune disease.
And so I'm wondering how that experience, which sounds like it impacted your life, quite substantially. Um, how that shaped your perspective, not just on how your career was evolving, because I know you shifted out of the career that you were in. That was pretty intense and, um, high level as a sales and marketing executive person into how it also shifted your perspective on relationships, intimacy, and self care.
Sarah: Yes, it was quite a journey. Um, It was in my mid to late 30s and I was diagnosed with MS, um, which was quite a shock. And I kind of went into that, um, that mode of, uh, like a crab in my shell where I just wanted to shut down everything around me because it was very scary. Um, and that [00:03:00] forced me to look at my life in huge detail.
Um, and when I look back now. People I work with now are so shocked at how I lived really unhealthily. Huge amounts of stress, high levels of cortisol, um, uh, eating badly, not sleeping enough, um, never exercising, uh, like, vegetables that didn't get a look in, like really every single level. And so I had to slow down and take, um, stock of everything.
And, and within the time when I sort of came a little bit out of my shell, Um, I found that actually relationships were quite difficult because I felt different and, um, I found it harder to connect with people. There was this weird thing about did I want to share it with people? Did I not want to share it with people?
I was going through sort of finding out how bad it was and all the things. Um, and so it, It was difficult. Um, and I did have a partner at the time. I think it may have even caused some cracks in our [00:04:00] relationship because it looked like a different future, potentially. And so there was all kind of connotations, um, actually from it.
Um, but it forced me to slow down and Take stock with every single aspect of my health. So I did exactly what I do now with clients. And that is to look at every element. So the sleep, the stress, the movement, the nutrition, mindset, um, even things like where are you getting your joy from, you know, all of that stuff that affects our holistic health.
Um, so I took stock and addressed every item bit by bit. Um. And within that, then the things that I did, like exercising, built my confidence again. And then I was able to connect with people more easily and with my partner. Um, so yeah, it was a really challenging time actually.
Andrea: Yeah, it sounds like it was.
It sounded like it asked you to really question everything, every element of your life as well. And that [00:05:00] forcing someone to slow down is kind of one of the things that I hear again and again from people who have a major Um, let's say interruption to life as it's going. So I'm wondering, how did you navigate, what were some of the ways that you navigated through that time?
Um, what were some of the tools or, um, things that you, that you drew in around you to help you navigate your way through it?
Sarah: Yeah, I am a really positive person. So I always look for ways to move forward in a, in a healthy, positive way. So I, instead of Googling the actual illness, I Googled health and what can I do to improve my health?
Um, Obviously, like I say, I went through the sleep, the stress, the movement, nutrition. Um, so I just took small steps every day. Um, and that really, I could notice the changes quite quickly. I was like, Oh, this feels better. Now I'm getting a better sleep. I did the hygiene and all of that sort of thing that really, um, [00:06:00] made a big, a big changes for me.
Um, I think. Um, taking, taking advice from other people who are living a healthier life was great. So I reached out to my, um, my peer group and said, Oh, you know, what do you do in this situation? And I just, I had to readdress everything. Um, so yeah, I took advice from online and I took advice from my peer group.
Andrea: Yeah. If you don't mind my asking a little bit about your relationship at the time, um, how did it impact that? Would you say all the changes that you were making you, it sounds like you were going through massive change. I'm wondering how your partner was experiencing you and the relationship as you were kind of morphing into this new, this new person really, um, how did that impact your relationship and how did you guys, um, work on it.
Sarah: It's funny how, um, um, it just, it made me think of, um, what happens with some of my clients sometimes that the changes they're going through are so big, you kind [00:07:00] of almost sometimes shift away from your relationship a little bit and come back together as a different person almost.
Um, and so I did shift away a little bit and because it just looked like a different picture instead of us sitting on the sofa in the evening doing nothing, I was like, Oh, I'm going for a quick run. Um, and it looked different, it really did, um, and I suppose now I think about it, I'd not really looked at it from this angle, but, um, we did break up not long after the, my diagnosis, maybe a year or so later, um, and I was a different person.
I had shifted lots of things, um, I'd stopped doing certain things and started doing other things, um, and whether that was the crux of it, um, or there was other scenarios at play, um, there definitely I think people look at each other in a different way when you're moving in a different direction. Um, and so perhaps that did cause, um, cause me to feel more confident and more like actually this wasn't the right place for me.
And, and, um, and that led to [00:08:00] that. But I think, um, for my personal journey, It was the most incredible thing to do to lift myself, um, in those enormous ways. And so I felt more confident and self assured in myself when I was, um, spending time in that relationship, if that makes sense.
Andrea: That makes perfect sense.
I've seen, I've witnessed, I've, I've kind of observed and myself have experienced time and again how when we go through this big, these big changes of what feels like pretty substantial shifts in how we are, that it can really be disruptive to a relationship. And disruption sounds like, can sound scary because it's uncertainty, it's change.
It's what's going to happen next. And I've kind of seen it go either way where couples, the other person will come along for the ride and begin to shift and change their life as well. Um, or one person just is really going in a different direction than the other.
And it's time for that relationship to, to end, which can be [00:09:00] very difficult, one difficult place to be, but then also can also potentially be liberating as well and give you that freedom to really embrace more and more of who you are and come together with a person who maybe is a little bit more of where you're now at. And so yeah, um, I believe that's where you are now. So well done on that.
Sarah: Thank you. Yeah, it's funny. Um, the changes I made took many years and I wish I'd had a health coach.
because I'd have done it much quicker, but when I eventually met my husband, I was still on the journey, and actually I became plant based for about six years when we were together maybe four or five years, and so I took him on that journey, but he was very much like, Okay, I'm doing this and he was going to work and saying to his friends, Oh, I drink oat milk now or whatever it was that we were doing at the time, but very much on board.
So like you say, the relationship previously wasn't the right one and then you find your person don't you? And, and they are, if they're in for the long haul, they will, you know, if, if, if it works for them, obviously, [00:10:00] but, um, join you in your crusade or whatever you're doing in your life that, you know, means something to you.
Andrea: It sounds like you found your person in yourself, like you found yourself or other parts of you that maybe were getting kind of unnoticed or not really operating at their full potential that you found yourself and then when you came, when, as that happened, then this other person was ready to also become more of who they are and just to be a different way in the world and that that sounds that's what I'm hearing.
That's what it sounds like to me, like a beautiful, beautiful love story.
Sarah: Yeah, really. And now we both, we're very much into our sport and health and nutrition and wellness. And so it's a, it's a, a beautiful thing. Cause then you both have shared goals and yeah.
Andrea: Yeah, it's smooth. It feels smooth. And I know you've witnessed this.
You mentioned you've witnessed this again and again with your clients that as they shift things, as they intentionally come to their life and say, okay, how can I be more healthy? How can I feel better? [00:11:00] Um, if you could tell me a little bit about some of the journeys that you see with your clients, where as they shift into a more healthy, what they're coming with, first of all, because so many people are burned out.
So many people are in high stress jobs. Not everyone wants to necessarily change their career entirely, but they may want to just, you know, how can I just do this differently? So that I feel better day to day. So that I feel better in my life. And I know you mentioned, you've seen how eventually over time also relationships and intimacy will come up or their sex life will come up.
And that you're able to really speak to that, um, and, and guide them and help them. So I'm wondering if you could share a little bit about some of the journeys that you see your clients move through and, um, the challenges they face, some of the things that they, you help them move through in that way.
Sarah: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I love this part of my job, um, because I see my clients like bloom in front of me. Um, their confidence grows. They might worry wanting to lose weight or start moving more. Um, definitely nutrition is an [00:12:00] element, but to see them bloom and their confidence and their face lights up and they're excited about life.
And when we do all kinds of things, you know, if they've got, um, something they want to achieve, like I had one client who wanted to learn, um, to fly a plane and she just was in her early fifties. She was like, I couldn't possibly. And by the time we'd finished working together, she was actually doing that.
Um, and my emphasis is on health, but if they have a goal, then I'm going to help them with that goal. There's an element of like life coaching within it. Um, one client, she reported to me, it's quite a funny story. She decided not to tell her husband that she was having my coaching. So she kept it to herself.
We were about maybe about seven weeks in maybe six or seven weeks in to our coaching and over the breakfast table, he just said to her, I said, what is going on with you? There's like a definite shift, uh, you're more confident. You're just looking good, da, da, da. And he was like, is there something going on?
Have you got some, you know, relationship with another man or something? [00:13:00] There was this weird conversation and she was like, yeah, I am seeing someone. And then eventually she sort of said, I'm seeing a health coach and I'm improving my health. And I've lost, you know, a couple of pounds here and there. And, you know, these trousers I've always wanted to put on fit and I'm feeling good.
And, you know, I've been playing more tennis or whatever it is. And, um, and so they had this conversation, he was like blown away and she was so proud of herself. She'd, she'd done this on her own. She, you know, made the changes, um, and he, he'd noticed obviously, but it was quite a funny story that he was thinking she was having a little extra, um, marital thing, but, um.
And then other clients that will report that actually, um, physically they want to feel closer to their partner, but their body image is down on its feet. Um, you know, uh, they are not looking after themselves, um, nutritionally. And so they're just cramming unhealthy foods in, which is making them feel worse.
You know, the relationship between our gut and our our mind or our brain, the gut health access, and, [00:14:00] and all of those areas. So you have to really pile all the healthy in, in all areas. And they've reported that actually, because their confidence has grown and because they feel better about themselves and their body image, then they feel more open and more willing to connect and just trust and all of those things come to play.
And so I often get, um, women and men. Um, whose marriages have improved and physical relationships have improved from, from health coaching.
Andrea: Yeah. That is such a big one, isn't it? It's just feeling better in yourself, feeling confident and shifting, shifting. Sometimes it's shifting weight, but sometimes it's also shifting just the way you see yourself or the way that you are with yourself and feeling, clearing up some of that stuff like your diet, cleaning, clearing and, um.
Feeling more healthy and alive can definitely, definitely impact how you are, how ready you feel to be intimate with your partner. I see in the couples that I work with too, how one person maybe [00:15:00] has had some hard knocks recently in career.
And maybe they've also put on some, some extra pounds or their, or their body's just changing, because our bodies are constantly changing throughout our lives and shifting into a new, like a kind of a new relationship with our bodies, a new relationship with ourselves as we, even as we age or get older is something that can impact then how confident we feel, which then does have this impact on our, um, our readiness to be intimate with someone or to be close to someone to be seen in that way.
And even if our partner reassures us that they love us and find us beautiful, that we need to also really believe that and feel that and embody that from the inside out. And it sounds like that is definitely an area that you dive into with your clients as well. There's nothing, yeah, no, no, no light, the light can shine in all the ways it sounds like through your work, which is amazing.
What would [00:16:00] you say is what are some of the practical ways, like if there were some simple, easy, practical ways, busy professionals, because like I was saying, people don't necessarily, maybe they love their careers, they're just overwhelmed, or they have a busy, a pretty busy career within their family life and everything, it's just, what are some practical easy ways for, for people who are feeling a bit overwhelmed by life, um, can implement pretty straight away to, to get there, to help them get there.
Sarah: As far as improving their own health or connecting with their partner?
Andrea: I would say improving their own health.
Sarah: Okay. There's so many more steps towards it that will really make impact. Um, I think, uh, depending on which one you attack, uh, you know, I speak to clients sometimes and they'll say, oh, I'm having You know, I'm just thinking off the top of my head.
Uh, you know, I'm having this set lunch every day, a sandwich, crisps and a bar of chocolate or something. And it doesn't have to be a massive change, [00:17:00] but maybe on two of the days, you can shift the crisps to some fruit and just make some small swaps because actually that will really improve things for you.
And as soon as you're eating slightly healthier, your mindset will be like, why would I put that junk in my body? Cause now I'm putting this good stuff. So it's a, it's a tiny shift, but actually it makes a massive difference. Um, as far as movement, um, I love an evening walk. Uh, I love getting my 10,000 steps or taking the dogs out.
Um, that can be something as well that you can share with your partner. Um, maybe like a screen, uh, free evening where you just connect over, um, you know, a conversation of planning a holiday or something like that, but you're connecting. Um, there's so many different things. Um, sleep hygiene, really a key sort of foundation for health.
Um, and making sure that because actually, as we get older, females and men suffer with sleep issues. [00:18:00] And, um, even if you have some insomnia or whatever it is you've got going on. It is such a foundational thing. And the reason for that, it has such an effect on our day. So if we haven't slept the night before, we may be grumpy.
So we might be attacking our relationships in a bit of a, um, disrupted way and not having a conversation that might be the, the, not the correct way, but the most loving way to, to converse with your partner. Then if you, um, are tired, you're likely to reach for the high sugar and high fat foods, um, because your body will send out the chemicals to say, I need something to give me energy.
It's like, it's not you just grabbing bad food, it's your body actually pushing you to grab that food. Um, and then from that, then you're tired to exercise, uh, you may feel stressed, so you might reach for the wine in the evening. So one thing after the other kind of takes place if you've missed that initial thing of sleep.
Andrea: Yeah.
Sarah: I went off on a bit of a tangent there, but. [00:19:00]
Andrea: Because I feel like there's so many different ways in and there's so many different ways to kind of start. And, um, as, because I work a lot with the body and the work that I do, I love movement as a way to begin connecting again with yourself and being out of your head. And right here in the present, in the present moment.
Which isn't always available to us if the present moment feels kind of scary because there's so much going on, but if you're in the rhythm of the body, if you're in the rhythm of movement, then that can really help bring you more into the world. And when we're present, we're more present with ourselves, we're more present in the world, we're present with our, with our partners, then that's amazing.
And sleep. Yes, I can also say sleep and rest because if your body is exhausted and tired, the last thing you want to do is be intimate with someone. You just want to rest and, or go on a date [00:20:00] because that just takes so much energy and it's energy that you don't necessarily have or want to spend. Um, when you are rested and feel like you are resourced in that way, you can draw from that, um, that space and really connect with people.
And with your body, with yourself, with another. So many. And they're basic things and sometimes they feel really, really hard to achieve. So I think those small, starting small, taking the little steps, making the tiny changes, and then adding over time, um, to them because it becomes that kind of positive reinforcement.
It's like that, that reinforcement of one good thing leads to the next good thing. And it could spiral the other way too. We know that for sure. Like a slippery slope. A slippery slope is a thing. Um, but really just getting started with the small stuff feels really good. Um, yeah. And the little nutrition hacks I love that you, that you've also fed in there are good.
Very good. [00:21:00] Okay. So what would you say are some of the most common challenges that people who come to you for coaching, um, have, what are they carrying with them? Especially nowadays with things.
Sarah: Yeah, absolutely. Um, I think stress is a big thing. Um, burnout, low energy, um, low self esteem, body image issues, those sorts of things.
Um, and so all of those compounded sort of people come to me and, um, and I always think of it like disrepair almost, and it's funny, I offer a six week program or a 12 week program, and depending on where they are, like, I'll have a consultation with them in the first instance, and then if I feel that they really need a lot of help, it'll be a 12 week program because you can get a lot done, um, during that time.
But, um, but yeah, I would say those main, those main things.
Andrea: Amazing. Do you, uh, do you, have you met many people who have [00:22:00] chronic fatigue or chronic, um, uh, symptoms or chronic illness that they're managing and how do you help them?
Sarah: Yes, I do have a number of clients that I work with, with chronic illnesses.
Um, I think that's maybe because they relate to the scenario that I've overcome. Um, And also, um, there's a lot of within England, there's a lot of people on waiting lists, um, that reach out for my help whilst they're on a waiting list for a specialist to do what they can to improve their health, um, before they see the specialist and just overcome some of the challenges.
Um, so yes, I, I help them in the, really the foundational things, again, the sleep, the stress, the found-, uh, the nutrition movement, all of those things. They make such a difference. And, um, seeing people put all of that together and, and you know, actually shift some things in their lives, it, it shows quite quickly on all levels of their confidence, um, their [00:23:00] self-esteem, their body image, um, and, and the way they relate to relationships.
I think if you have a chronic illness, it does cause quite a lot of stress in itself. Um, if you're not sure of your diagnosis or it's a long term diagnosis or you, there's uncertainty or like I say, waiting lists, um, it's, it's a really difficult place for people to be. So they do need quite a lot of support on their journey.
Um, and I think there's definitely that closed down as far as relationships, um, are concerned partially because people feel reliant on their partner and whether that's going to be a long term thing or they might, um, you know, end up, um, you know, being, uh, debilitated or whatever it is. Um, so there's all of those things that come into play.
Andrea: Yeah. That shift in how we relate to our partners, especially when something like illness comes in, feels like a big piece. And is it going to be a long term? Is it going to be forever? [00:24:00] Is it going to, how are things going to shift or change? And how are we going to do the dance? How are we going to navigate our way through this?
What's this tango going to look like? What are the steps that I've never done before that that are going to be now have to be learned or, uh, yeah, just practiced. And it sounds like you are a great gateway. And, um, such a support for people moving through that. So thank you for that work because it's so important and um, it's a lot to manage.
It's just a lot to, to be with. And if you feel, you don't feel great, then it impacts pretty much every area of your life. So.
Sarah: Sure can. Yeah, absolutely. I had a client recently who had colitis and, um, her partner, they'd only been together maybe five or 10 years, not, not, it was like a later life partner. Um, and they, they love to travel.
And so now she is severely, um, troubled about that because she really can't be away from home for long periods of time and feels it's difficult to travel. And, um, you know, it doesn't want to be on a plane for eight hours, [00:25:00] that kind of thing.
And so their, their whole thing has had to shift. Um, obviously she's working on improvements with me to balance that and, um, and try and improve the, um, the colitis, uh, reoccurring. But, um, like you say, the whole, the whole relationships comes under the spotlight, like, okay, this looks different. This isn't quite what we expected for our life. And then, and, um, and so it takes some getting used to and some, you know, shifting around.
Andrea: Maybe asking the deeper questions of what really matters, like what really is, what really are we connecting on and how can we live that more fully? Um, there's some beautiful questions that can emerge and some beautiful things that can come through that might surprise people as well. So it's not all doom and gloom and not all kind of like now I've got to adjust this new way.
It can be a really beautiful opening for new ways of relating, new ways of being intimate and close and, um, and feeling vital. and happy and healthy together.
Sarah: [00:26:00] Absolutely. They found, um, uh, that they both love to, um, what's it called? Paddleboard. Um, and so they live a lot near the river. So now their new, uh, their new joy is, is paddleboarding together.
Um, and so they found a, they found a shared love of that and so slightly less travel, but lots of enjoying, um, UK trips where they can go and be on the river.
Andrea: Oh, beautiful. So exploring their backyard.
Sarah: Yeah, absolutely.
Andrea: And it is a beautiful place, it is a beautiful place to be, so yes, yes to the UK, a little cheer for the UK.
Sarah: Yeah.
Andrea: If people wanted to connect with you, you are UK based, uh, if they wanted to connect with you, learn more, dive in, um, how can they do that? What's the best way to find you?
Sarah: So I am, my website is, um, www.sarahstannard.com. Um, they can reach out on there. Um, I've had lots of you, um, American clients, uh, actually over the years.
It's a [00:27:00] really, um, a great, uh, link with the UK and I think, um, yeah, I enjoy working with clients all over the world, but, um, I also have an Instagram account, @sarahstannardhealthcoaching, um, for any business contacts. Cause I do a lot of corporate work, uh, I'm on LinkedIn, so yeah.
Andrea: Great. So many, many ways in.
And I know that you have a special offer as well to listeners and, or, and people who, I think it's to sign up for your, if they sign up to your mailing list, then you're generously offering 15 percent off on one-to-one services. And, um, free managing stress handout as well, which sounds good.
Sarah: Absolutely, absolutely. And there is actually, for anyone that's interested on my website, there's a free download.
And that is the blood sugar balancing, um, sort of method. So if, um, anyone's looking to improve their mood, their energy levels, um, [00:28:00] and even lose a few pounds, then the blood sugar balancing is really on point. Um, and you can get that free on my website.
Andrea: Amazing. Yay. Yay, it's a blood sugar balance. And yay to, uh, yeah.
Thank you so much for being such a wonderful fount of wisdom, fountain of wisdom today and sharing your, your experiences and your expertise and everything will be in the show notes. So if people do want to connect, they can connect with you in the show notes. And if there was one last thing that you wanted to share, if someone were to take that first initial step, what might that be?
Sarah: Yeah, I think, um, the thing to consider is, uh, take care of yourself. Um, as your first sort of thought, I think some people put themselves second or third or fourth. And as women, I don't know if a lot of your listeners are women. Um, we sometimes come way down the line. Uh, that's one of the things I work with, with my clients, they come to me and they say, this is my time now.
I want to do something for myself. [00:29:00] Um, so take care of yourself. Put your own, um, mask on first because, you know, if you're not, if you're not in, uh, you know, perfect, um, healthy yourself, you find it hard to help your family or, um, or your partner. Um, and also if you're looking after yourself with the self care and health, then you're going to feel more confident and you can give more to the people that you love.
Andrea: Absolutely. Yes. And yes to that. And the impact that that has on your relationships and everyone around you, as you say, is, and also your sex life, to be honest, also intimate life as well. If you're considering yourself as much as the other person, then that can really shift things there too. So, so much beautiful ways to explore life and living.
It feels really good. Thank you for being such a wonderful guest and everyone check out Sarah's work. It's really incredible.
Sarah: Oh, thank you so much. It's been lovely to see you. [00:30:00]
Andrea: Thank you for listening. Share this podcast with anyone you feel would benefit from its message. If you love what you heard, rate and review us wherever you listen. And if you feel that you could use some support, connect with me, Andrea Balboni, through my website, LushCoaching.com. That's L U S H C O A C H I N G dot com. Special thanks to Nicholas Singer for the musical score, and Dion Knight for editing and production. [00:30:53]