Before sitting down to write this, I realised that I ‘needed’ a coffee. And then that the laundry ‘needed’ to be run. Oh, and then I remembered that an email ‘needed’ responding to…and then...and then…
Let’s call this like it is – Resistance!!
Some part of you is resisting your moving forward to getting the love and partnership that you want.
Resistance can rule your life if you don’t watch out.
So it’s best to learn how to work with it.
If you made it this far, you are ready to actively create the love that you want in your life. You have a clear idea about what that looks like. You may already have started to create that by bringing it into 5D* – embedding it in your mind, body and soul.
If you’ve done Part 1, you’ve begun to experience what it will feel like on a daily basis to be in the relationship that you envision.
And you’ve got a daily practice in place to support you in this. If you follow the 5D model, that’s a daily recording you’re listening to at key moments in the day.
And then…resistance shows up
What is resistance?
Maybe you start to ‘forget’ to do your daily practice of listening + feeling. Or you think that you might be better served by more rest and drop back to sleep.
Those are some of the symptoms of resistance.
Symptoms of resistance can look like:
Tiredness (my fav…think I need another nap)
Boredom
Procrastination
Busy-ness / no time
Irritability + crankiness
And then the voices start and you get totally thrown off track:
You begin to doubt whether it’s even worth it
If it matters that much
If it’s really attainable
And even whether you really want it
And you move from the tangible feeling your future relationship in your hands NOW, to a drop back into your old self (your old vibration) and the old familiar way of being.
Say what?!!?
You’ve owned up to the fact that a partnership that lasts is the single-most important thing for you right now – it’s at the top of that long list of desires – and now you’re telling me that you’re not even sure you want it?
Watch out, because that’s fear and self-doubt at play. NOT what your soul truly wants.
So what is really going on here?
What is the root cause of the resistance?
It’s super easy to fall back into old beliefs and their corresponding thought and behavioural patterns because like well-paved roads – they feel familiar. And in that familiarity they feel safe.
So whilst we begin to understand how they limit us and our potential for new experiences, we continue to cling to what is safe and familiar.
The obvious problem with continuing down the well-paved road is that it will lead us where we’ve already been and NOT in the new direction. The new direction which will lead us to the new reality of the relationship that we’ve so clearly defined in the 5D process and have begun to feel in our bodies as real and attainable.
Well-paved roads are in fact, sets of learned beliefs and associated emotions from culture, society, our families and other past experiences that want re-writing.
Resistance is the part(s) of ourselves that are trying desperately to hold on to these old ways and want to continue down the old well-paved roads.
These parts of us buried deep in our subconscious have yet to believe we’ll survive a different way of being.
They need reassurance that the new way we wan to live is going to be ok. And that you’ll survive it.
So how do we access these parts of ourselves that are resisting and show them we are ready to move forward?
The parts of us that carry the old beliefs and associated emotions get stored in our bodies on a physical level. And as such can be accessed through the physical body where we release them and free ourselves.
Talk therapy attempts to do this by accessing the analytical mind and the underlying emotions. As our minds are masterful at spinning stories. Many of us are familiar with the term ‘the monkey mind’ to describe our overactive brains. Getting beneath all the chatter to discover what is truly going on can take anywhere from several months to many years.
Whilst talk therapy can help many people, there is a faster and more direct way to reach the deeper parts of you that are resisting change. And that is through the physical body.
How to access resistance and can I do it on my own?
You can learn to do this on your own. It’ll take some practice. And it’s much easier to do once you’ve been guided by a coach like me through a process called focusing.
Step 1
You’ll want to get quiet and still like you would in meditation or visualisation practices. Bring your focus inwards and let your eyelids gently close. This will help you really tune in to what is going on in your body.
Step 2
Bring to mind and really feel the emotions and sensory experiences of your 5D reality.
Step 3
Scan your body starting from the top of your head and working your way down. Feel into where the resistance sits – is it a heaviness in your belly? A tightness in your chest? A burning or numbness somewhere in your body?
Step 4
Once you locate the resistance bring your full awareness and attention to that place in you. Drop fully into the physical sensations of it so much so that you feel as if you have become the sensation.
Step 5
Begin to ask this part of your body the following and see what responses bubble up. Don’t try to make sense of it or figure it out, just see what arises:
What is your purpose?
What are you doing for me?
What do you need from me?
What do you need to know in order for me to move forward in life?
The answers that you get are the keys to giving yourself what you need so that you can realise your desire for relationship.
How to move forward
Once you’ve identified what is really going on and have identified what it is that you need to move forward, now it’s time to find a part of yourself that can give you this.
We’ve all got ‘power pieces’ inside of us that can support us in moving forward. There are parts of us that contain the strength and wisdom to support us to move forward in life.
Here’s how to access them:
Step 1
Repeat the body scan you did whilst still holding the vision for your future in your body mind.
This time notice the parts of your body that feel powerful and supportive. Maybe it’s a warming in your belly or a tingling in your arms.
Step 2
As this part of you if it’s willing to give you what was asked for so you can move forward.
Step 3
Have this part of you connect with the part of you that showed up as resistance so that it can ‘see’ you’ve got it covered.
Gently come back to the room and open your eyes.
Write down the ways that you can move from this place of power in your life.
For example, if your power piece showed up in your belly and resistance was in your throat, what are some ways for you to voice your truth or communicate more powerfully when with someone you are attracted to.
Consistently living from your power is what will allow you to create the healthy relationship you want in your life. You’ll be confident, grounded and your magnetism will draw in love.
How can a coach help
I’ve done the best I can to explain the powerful process I bring people through to get very fast results, however it is nothing next to experiencing it with expert guidance.
This is a deep process and requires some degree of connection with one’s own body and internal world – and it is not for everyone. Those who struggle to connect with their bodies and emotions but are open to doing so can be guided however and also experience excellent results.
The skill and experience of my abilities as a coach comes from years of working with this combined with other powerful modalities has proven to perfectly prepare people for exactly what they want – and they get it. Read what they have to say here.
In addition, it takes dedicated practice to pave a new road. I’ll be there with you to ensure that you stay with it and get what you want in life.
We’ll journey together.
If you’d like to learn more about working with me, send me an email at andrea@lushcoaching.com
I offer free 15 minute intro chats to understand if coaching with me is right for the both of us.